I have to hold very fast to my scepticism when in presence of Mr Porteous. In particular, must I persist in thinking of him as Mr Porteous, for example; since if I did not, I should probably find myself going all Jane Eyre on you: saying “Reader, he affected me!” - and calling him ‘dear David’, just like all the rest. I had only to be left alone in the garden with him for ten minutes the other day, to be reminded of just how vital it is to keep up one’s guard when in company with him.
He does that to you; he has a way of making you want to fill his silences, make things easy for him. It’s a considerable art. One that he perfected, I daresay, whilst gazing down upon his adoring congregation from the pulpit. He has had years in which to study its effects after all - and for my own part, well, it was only by summoning the image of Bill’s jubilant countenance (Bill would have relished the idea of my being made subject against my will!), that I was spared the ignominy of breaking out at once in foolish chatter again.
He and Frances had been engaged in making little water-colour sketches of the knot garden when I interrupted them. Mr Porteous was poised with brush-stroke in the making, but was quick to stand up from his easel and put out his hand to me in greeting; explaining as he did so that in this enterprise, as in so many others, it was Frances who led, he who entirely ineptly followed. “ I have very little aptitude, I’m afraid” he told me (he had the most engaging small smile for it). “But Miss Fanshawe has been kind enough to take me in hand. She‘s finding it uphill work though. My daughters have considerable skill in all branches of painting and the plastic arts, but it’s a gift they must have inherited from their mother, since I have never been able to lay claim to any such thing myself.”
Frances fluttered some kind of self-deprecatory little response to this. She had been painting in water colour since she was a small girl, she explained; her father had been fond of it too. But she had never received the least tuition, and didn’t believe she had progressed beyond the entirely amateurish stage. She thought Mr Porteous under-estimated himself, besides. “His little sketch of the knots was most accurate,” she said. “And I think he has captured the mood of the garden extremely well.” She took up his picture to show me, wanting to know if I didn’t agree with her? She was very pink beneath her sun-hat, and I thought her hand trembled a little, but she was doing her best to seem perfectly at ease.
She talked with me a little longer – she missed Bill and Monty on the common, but she was so pleased to hear about his fishing trip, and hoped it would help restore him to full health. She remembered then that Mrs Meade had promised to bring tea at four o’clock; and since that hour had already passed, and still no sign, she thought she ought to go and see what had become of her. Having said which, she drifted off in the direction of the house; leaving me in silent confrontation with Mr Porteous across the easels, wondering what I might conceivably say that would be of interest to him.
It occurred to me that Frances’s reference to Bill might provide a start, so I ventured to suggest that it might interest Mr Porteous to know that my brother, too, was writing a book about his experiences in the Middle East? I knew I did Bill no favours in linking his book with that of David Porteous – there could hardly have been any juxtaposition I might have hit upon indeed, that he would actually have disliked more! But if Mr Porteous had heard of Bill, he was prepared to show no sign of it. He only remarked that of course his own small offering was unlikely to cause much of a stir. He did not expect to set the world alight with his musings, he said – but he had dared to think he might kindle a spark or two.
I murmured what I could in response to this. I think I said something to the effect that there was need, in this particular field, for a study from every possible angle. But his message had not escaped me; and it was clear, from the way he removed his eyes from mine to gaze, meditatively, at some point in the middle distance above my head, that he thought there was room in this garden for only one man of distinction at a time.
I tried the subject of his daughter next, mentioning that I had visited her shop, and thought she had arranged it so artistically. “She makes such pretty things too – and all herself, she tells me! I simply couldn’t resist buying two of her samplers, and an embroidered cushion. They look so charming in my little sitting room at the gatehouse. ” I was gushing, I knew it; and was not proud of myself. Nor was I prepared for his response, which came only after a considerable silence, and which I thought, in all the circumstances, just a little sharp.
“Oh yes, the shop…” he said - and it was remarkable to me, how much of pure dismissiveness he could put into that one word. He had collected himself the next moment, though, and went on in more light-hearted vein. “She would have her little shop, you know! It was not in the least what I had hoped for her. And I’m afraid she will make a very poor sort of shop-keeper - giving away all her prettiest things to the first person who expresses an interest in them, and operating at a loss! Personally, I thought it a poor sort of use to which to put her inheritance from her aunt. And a poor sort of return, come to that, for all the money I have been required to expend on her art school education!”
He smiled very pleasantly whilst delivering himself of these remarks. But there was a coldness beneath, which made me sorry I had introduced the subject of Anne and her shop at all. I felt a sudden stab of compassion for the girl indeed: it couldn’t be easy, I thought, to find favour in the eyes of such a father. On the whole I was very glad when at length the clematis curtain parted again, and Frances had returned; followed closely by Mrs Meade, and each of them bearing heavily laden trays. Mr Porteous sprang up at once to do what he could to relieve them of their burdens, and there followed a short period of intense activity, during which tables were arranged and teapots put down. I was glad of the distraction, and found myself able to breath more easily again. The moment had come and gone, I thought, in which I might have heard myself doing the unthinkable - which was to say challenging the unimpeachable Mr Porteous; and on his own home ground at that.
Tea passed pleasantly enough, and I stayed another forty minutes or so. Mrs Meade and Frances between them had gone to a good deal of trouble in the matter of cakes and sandwiches, and I didn’t want to seem ungracious by rushing away too soon. Mr Porteous’s smooth surface had been entirely restored, besides. He chatted amiably about this and that, and was gracious kindness itself, toward Frances. I have to admit that I saw nothing in his conduct or demeanour to suggest that there was anything more than a perfectly innocent friendship between them - and I fully intend to apprise Rose and Pamela of the fact.
I had received a glimpse of something else in him however. I had known it must be there, so it hardly surprised, though did alarm me a little. I mean to hold on to it, at any rate. Mr Porteous is not quite what he seems: Bill insisted on it, and I now believe he was right. I’m not at all sure what I’ll be able to do if Frances takes it into her head to fall in love with him – but I shall continue to try to keep her welfare very closely within my sights.
Saturday, 5 May 2007
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14 comments:
He sounds rather manipulative, Beatrice. I recognise the type! A charming man with a dark side.
I do hate people who pretend to be inept while producing exceptionally good results. Very undermining I think.
Lovely piece of writing again. I do wish I was able to write stories. Such a gift.
I'm sure you could do it, Marianne. It requires only a little leap of the imagination and a complete suspension of self. I've been doing it since I was ten though, so I guess I've got into the habit of making things up!
Rosalind says:
Delicious, scrumptious & so entertaining..... You are definitely leading us down the garden path - & always leaving us wanting to know more.
Have you been writing all your life, Beatrice?
Your writing appears fluent, effortless and pleasurable to read..
One day, Beatrice, one day perhaps. I was in Waterstone's the other day and, having spent far too much, they gave me a complimentary copy of their Review Magazine. So many voices, speaking so beautifully. Utterly daunting. But no reason not to keep trying!
I think a lot of people would be disappointed if you stopped. Please don't.
Jan, thank you for your encouraging words. And yes, I've been writing stories since I was ten - though with long gaps of course, for child-raising etc.
The blog approach is helpful for imposing discipline - though how the finished product would cobble back again into a book, is anyone's guess!
It's now-or-never time for me though - and no, it's not ENTIRELY effortless!
(don't know how to do bold here, I'm afraid)
Dear i beatrice,
I have read this piece several times now over the last few days, and your style appears effortless. I am completely in awe of you. You really are gifted.
DM
Please don't be in awe of me Dulwich Mum! I stuggle and despair, just like everyone else. And of course nothing is ever quite effortless. You'd be surprised at the amount of effort that goes into seeming effortless!
Thank you for your comment though, and please stay with me till the end if you can.......
(This is a very big experiment for me.)
Oh my what brilliant use of language on your part. I felt as though I had stepped into circa 185something. Your description of his attitude toward his daughter was poignant. I am glad to have found you, here in the blogging world. I shall indeed read on, and return for more.
I especially appreciate the vision of the garden and tea today. Here in Northern Africa it is ninety degrees and dusty.
I will always be close by. Didn't I say, I don't get out much? You are my social life!
Oh I so want to know what will happen next!
I am always intrigued by a man who is not what he seems...
Lady Macleod (oh my goodness, you might almost be Lady Macauley mightn't you!): I'm so glad you have been reading me, and left so many kind comments everywhere. I have just posted the next one, and hope I don't disappoint.
You will enjoy the rain though, I think?
Dear Dulwich Mum, you say such lovely things! I've heard you say them to Rilly, so never dreamt you'd say the same to me.
Hope the new instalment doesn't disappoint.
Debio, I hope you won't mind losing Mr P for a while! That's the trouble with having a large cast, and a short blog allowance - one can only get things in one at a time.
Never fear though, he will return shortly.
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